It's amazing how one's own desire to change something, to refresh life, can influence the course of events and completely turn everything upside down. Every person has their own ideas, desires, and expectations they wish to see realized or have events align with the mental picture they hold. However, given life circumstances and the presence of others with their own visions and perspectives, reality can differ from what is desired. We never know in advance what form the imagined ideal—something that should definitely improve the present—will take.
In relationships, not everything depends on one side, and it can be difficult to predict possible developments when several different people come together and shape a shared daily life. The decision of the married couple, Eric and Anna, to create a commune and invite acquaintances to share a large house for mutual benefit forever changed their peaceful, measured life, introducing many adjustments one wouldn't immediately anticipate, as the group has its own unique dynamic. It's immediately apparent that Eric takes the initiative in implementing this process but doesn't call himself a leader, emphasizing that everyone in the commune is equal. However, this doesn't hold when it comes to his personal interests; in a state of affect, he expresses anger and rage, driving everyone out of the house.
There's a shared oral fantasy within the group that serves as an escape from difficult emotions—whenever something challenging arises and there's an opportunity to discuss what hurts us and what problems we face, someone changes the subject and starts talking about food, praising the chef's culinary skills for dinner. The tension grows, and the group can't yet handle it, so someone throws a lifeline—and the conversation shifts to a safe zone. Thus, the group is in the first phase of dependency according to Bion, where participants prioritize forming a sense of security and mutual protection, almost like nestling together and seeking shelter from the harsh realities of everyday life.
The group's communication is quite intriguing, as what appears on the surface often doesn't match unconscious manifestations. Interpersonal bonds form, with members inviting each other into closeness indirectly—through requests for help or veiled suggestions—while maintaining a friendly atmosphere and protecting the group from anything too intimate. This is discussed in group meetings but with extreme caution to avoid accidentally shattering something fragile and still immature. I suspect this is one of the group's creations—to maintain balance, where one thing breaks down while another forms, making it easier for the commune to endure potential threats.
It's interesting how the group unites to protect Anna during the vote on whether Emma should be allowed to live with them. During discussions, everyone supports Eric, but when Anna states she's only willing to accept Eric's lover temporarily, the group senses the tension and votes solely for temporary accommodation. Here, it's clear how important it is for the commune to preserve things as close to the initial stage as possible, not to destroy what united them or hurt any member. Externally, the women are beautiful, blonde, and similar, but as Anna notes, they share much in common except for eye color—and the fact that Anna sleeps alone while Emma shares a bed with Eric. Anna's emotional pain manifests in other areas of her life: alcohol consumption, tears, crying, job loss. Her daughter notices how unhappy she is and even suggests she move out, saying it would be better that way. The commune can't help with this; it tried to preserve everything intact, but circumstances are stronger. The group can't contain or process the suffering of an individual, so it seems easier for Anna to leave. This approach seems ecological for the group—something they can handle, given their own avoidance of deeper issues and fear of expressing overwhelming emotions. Impulses seem to beg for release, but without mutual trust, everything simplifies to the idea of good times and fun.
However, when it comes to resolving the so-called triangle issue, the group rightly shifts responsibility to Anna and Eric, stating that it's their matter and the commune members can't decide their relationship. The group doesn't take on the responsibility of resolving the relationship dynamics that Anna and Eric try in every way to pass on to others.
The relationship between Freya and Peter—an older boy from school—serves as a distraction from what hurts, a fantasy about what's happening in their relationship, attempts to flirt with them, and invitations to share intimate moments. Interestingly, these relationships began as Freya's attempt to cope with difficult family circumstances—dealing with her parents' divorce. At the start of their romance, there were no signs of tenderness, care, or love; sex resembled a set of mechanical movements devoid of emotional depth. Later, something deeper emerges—care and attachment, making one want to believe in the sincerity of their feelings.
There's another idea that unites everyone: the fantasy that a boy with a heart condition will live to the age of nine. He himself decided this and mentions it every time they meet. As his father noted, Willas could only live in an era of love—perhaps when everything is crumbling and the present differs from what was before, the boy couldn't endure the harsh realities of life. Interestingly, the fatal attack occurred after the commune met the boy Freya was seeing, suggesting he had feelings for the older girl. Shared grief once again unites all members of the commune. It's something they can more easily endure together, sharing the pain of both Willas's parents and supporting each other to ease the difficult emotions.
How often in life do we want something to happen, for our desires to become reality, without considering that the outcome might differ from our imagined picture? What if things don't go according to plan? Not everything can be predicted or controlled, and reality doesn't always align with expectations. Yet, a person is capable of coping with various difficulties and challenges that, at first glance, may seem catastrophic. Through this film, we can see that external circumstances and the people around us, to some extent, contribute to positive internal changes.
